Here’s to a happy, healthy, and prosperous 2007!

Pud,

I just broke up with my girlfriend of two years. There are several reasons why, but mainly I just felt like we grew apart and out of love.

The problem is, I see her with other guys all the time and it rips me apart.

What’s the best way for me to get over her?

Thanks,
Mark
18 years old
Thief River Falls, Minnesota

Mark,

You’ll never get over her. But you don’t have to be jealous of the other guys.

Here’s how.

Everytime you see her with another guy, just think to yourself, “I wonder if her mouth still tastes like my cock.”

Then crack a little smile when introducing yourself to him.

Pud

Pud,

Do you have a pet?

Bilal
6 years old

Bilal,

No.

But when I was 15 I had a ferret named Eddie.

Pud

Pud,

What is the most delicious candy?

Thank you,
Edward
26 years old

Edward,

The most delicious candy is Mike & Ike’s, original fruit flavor.

Pud

Pud,

I follow your site and I love it. I’ve read a lot about your bold entrepreneurial moves and respect what you’ve done.

I have one question: What advice would you give to someone who is young, hungry and intelligent, looking to succeed in life and business?

Ryan
24 years old
San Francisco, CA

Ryan,

Thanks for the kind words.

You always hear people say “follow your dreams and you can accomplish whatever you want” — right? I know it sounds trite and cliche. And it is, but that’s because there’s one important thing missing.

The dream.

Most people don’t know what their dream is. Notice I didn’t say “most people don’t have a dream.” Everyone has a dream or a passion. But pulling it out is the hard part.

No longer. I’m gonna break it down for you. Here’s the secret:

AIM LOW.

Now I don’t mean don’t shoot for the stars. Dream big, but set a SMALL goal to get everything moving in the right direction. I’ll give you an example.

My goal when starting my first business, was “I want to throw away my alarm clock.” Specifically, I hated (and still do) waking up early every morning. I said to myself, “there’s gotta be a way to make the same amount of money I’m currently making, but wake up whenever I feel like it.”

I figured out that I could be a freelance programmer, working from home. If my clients called in the morning and I didn’t answer, they’d just think I was busy or at a meeting. The day I threw away my alarm clock was one of the happiest days of my life.

And guess what the side-effect was… I had a profitable, growing business.

One step at a time, in life and business.

Rock on,
Pud

Pud,

Should women wear their underwear to sleep, including bras?

Deb
34 years old
Waltham, MA

Deb,

Women should sleep either naked, or in a big t-shirt if you’re cold. No bra.

Pud

Pud,

I’ve never been in bed with two women at the same time. Is it as great as they say?

Sincerely,
Rob
21 years old

Rob,

It’s not as great as you’d think.

One of the best things about good sex is the intimacy — when two people merge into one. Heavy breathing, sweat, the works. When you’re with two women at the same time, it’s kind of hard and awkward to be especially intimate with either. In many ways it’s closer to masturbation than hot sex — it’s purely physical and mostly work on your part.

That said, the real payoff is the memory. You might not remember all the individual times you’ve had sex — but you remember the threesomes.

(most of them at least)

Pud

Hiii Pud =]

I like this boy and we flirt everyday. We’ve been friends for 4 years, but secretly I’ve loved him since I’ve known him. Recently we’ve been closer than ever.

I’m confused about whether he likes me or not. We flirt (hugging, play fighting, him picking me up, etc.) and he’s always around me. I’m loving the attention. I want to talk to him about it but I’m not sure how to bring the subject up without scaring him and making things awkward.

I want to walk away happy no matter what comes out of it.

Please help!

xoxo,
Hazel
15 years old
Lincoln, Nebraska

Hazel,

I think everyone over 15 who’s reading this is thinking the same thing — “he likes you, 100%.”

He’s totally into you and dreams about you every night. The problem is, he’s shy (like all 15 year old guys) and doesn’t know what to do. He’s waiting for you to make the first move — and he’ll feel SO relieved when you do.

Asking me was the first step. Telling him is the next step.

Another thing everyone over 15 who’s reading this is thinking — “prepare for fun, happy, sad, exciting, and educational times ahead!”

Happy trails,
Pud

Pud,

I’m a good looking guy and I do okay, but I want more sex.

How can I get more (free) sex?

Thanks,
Dan
26 years old
Europe

Dan,

Go gay. Easy to get more sex.

Want to up the ante? Be a gay prostitute.

Pud

Dear Pud,

Do fish drink water?

Thanks,
Beth
19 years old

Beth,

No, not by our definition of the word “drink.”

But all living organism need water to survive. Fish absorb it through their gills and skin.

Pud